On Chaos, Peace, and the End of Perfectionism

I guess I started this post over a month ago, but chaos intervened and I never got around to finishing it.  You know what I say to that? Que sera sera!

 

The truth is, I have lost track of anything specific I had to say about this topic, though I realize at one time I did have something specific in mind to say. It’s just – my world is spinning and I don’t have either the time or the peace and quiet to formulate much that is coherent these days. As I type this, for example, on a Tuesday morning at the end of summer, I am being simultaneously bombarded with questions, dogs tussling, a toddler seeking my lap, the sounds of an X box, and at any given moment at least 3-6 children clamoring, laughing, squealing, or squabbling. And this is about as calm as my day will get.

My family size has literally doubled in the last year.  I am still grappling with how to manage the laundry and house cleaning chores, keep track of clothing inventory, medical and dental appointments, and budget for food – let alone learning to connect with the specific emotional needs of precious souls in need of love and calm and patience in the midst of their own internal chaos. My mind is completely boggled on a daily basis.

On top of that, I am about to start a new school year with four children in two very different grade schools, (which will have different rules, uniforms, daily schedules AND calendars) and renew homeschooling my high-schooler. I’m almost ready… I think. I’ve been to new parent meetings at one school, I’ve done all most of the paperwork, I’ve bought the curriculum but not the supplies for Himself.

I just realized I don’t know how to pack a school lunch. #homeschoolersforlife

And if that weren’t enough, we are about to add another baby to the mix – and this, I assure you, is a twist I emphatically did NOT see coming. That will make 11 children in the household, with 7 of them under the age of 10.

Nope, this life of mine is not going to return to order any time soon. And that’s really the point I think – that I am ok with having much to do, and not being able to perfectly formulate, or present to the world in any way a perfect façade of peace and tranquility. And yet, in the midst of this craziness, I do have peace. I don’t even know why… well, yes I do. It’s got to be God! I know I am exactly where I belong, doing what He has called me to do. He didn’t call me to have a Better Homes and Gardens showcase home, a perfectly tidy desk and life that runs like clockwork. He called me to love the kids He brings to me, and trust Him for the strength I need to get through each day.

So here you go – these snapshots are portraits of my world!



And when we’re done making messes, we clean them up.



It’s all good.

It’s all good.

Because every single bit of it is All. GRACE.

One thought on “On Chaos, Peace, and the End of Perfectionism

  1. paulyho39

    My goodness! We have had a blast watching these pictures of the kids there…washing the floor! All I can say is “God’s blessings upon you all!”

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